#whole30 #day12

Breakfast: stir fried veg, smoked mackerel, kimchi.

 Lunch: 'coleslaw' made with grated carrot, shredded cabbage, radish, spring onions, olives and capers; avocado, prawns fried in coconut oil and garlic, and a baked sweet potato. DELICIOUS. (thank you hubs)

Dinner: roasted parsnips and squash with pan fried liver and pork belly, leeks and whatever veg we had left. £30-worth of veg hasn't lasted very long!

#whole30 #day11

 Breakfast: smoked mackerel, cucumber, kimchi, for two. With green tea :-)

Lunch: stir fry with mackerel and TONS of sesame oil.

Dinner: Thai red curry with fish. Amazeballs.

#whole30 #day10

Breakfast: stir-fried veg, mackerel and kimchi

Lunch: stir fried veg with sweet potato and tahini. The tahini was amazing, so nice to have something different.

Dinner: Stir-fried veg and beef mince with kimchi.

#whole30 #day9

Breakfast: smoked mackerel, cucumber, kimchi, a few cashews

Lunch: salad - broccoli, courgette, radish, cucumber, trout,  sweet potato, olive oil.

Dinner: Stir fried veg and pan fried trout. Jon did the veg with  fish sauce, and it was oddly delicious!

#whole30 #day8

Another late breakfast, cooked by my husband: scrambled egg and fried mackerel with stir fried veg and kimchi.

 Dinner: THE SPICIEST STEW IN THE WORLD. Cooked again by my husband. Carrots, sweetcorn, white fish, courgette, a few raisins and a whole lotta 'tagine spice'.

#whole30 #day7

Grandad's birthday!

Breakfast: spinach and courgette omelette with some smoked mackerel

 Lunch: Baked sweet potato with fried liver, cabbage and broccoli (with olive oil and balsamic vinegar)

Afternoon tea! Gluten-free and diabetic (i.e. low sugar). It was delicious, and I didn't feel even remotely sad I couldn't have what everyone else was having. Indeed, everyone else got food envy ;)

What everyone else had. Delicious, but not as good as mine!

#whole30 #day6

 Now, day 6 was a Saturday, so I of course massively slept in and ended up having a sort of brunch instead of breakfast and lunch.

Brunch: brown rice, mackerel, poached egg, cucumber, kimchi.

Dinner chez little bro: spinach, green beans, courgette and STEAK! Delicious.

#whole30 #day5

Breakfast: rice, kimchi, smoked mackerel. As per usual. Forgot to take a picture as I was being questioned by a Chinese person on my voluntary use of chopsticks, and weirdly Asian breakfast choices. My Englishness swelled, and I was deeply embarrassed by my unusual behaviour. Somehow 'because I like it' didn't seem sufficient :-P

Lunch: bento box with the usual suspects - rice, radishes, beansprouts, cucumber, chicken, kimchi, olive oil

Dinner: POACHED EGGS! (exciting, no?), the last of the meat off the chicken carcass, broccoli, cuzcumber, courgette, sweet potato.

Interestingly, today I have not eaten peppers, and I have not swelled up like a balloon. Before I started this I suspected nightshades were an intolerance I had, so from here on in no aubergines, tomatoes, or peppers.

*sad face* that's 3 of my favourite veggies :-(

I'm off to visit the littlest moo tomorrow, and have hung onto the carcass of the chicken to make stock. Little does he know that's what we'll be doing...

#day4 Struggling.

I wrote this last night when I was feeling distinctly low about the whole Whole30 thing. I thought about not posting it, as it's pretty personal and a bit ranty - but you know what, this is how I was feeling, and I don't want to censor that. This 30-day challenge is a voyage into uncharted territory, and I want to chart it as it happens - the downs as well as the ups.

So...

It’s #day4 and I’m having a tough time. I’m mostly putting this down to spending last night and some of this morning writing a short article that has been swiftly rejected by it's target publication – there’s nothing like a bit of rejection to put me in a low mood.

It’s times like this I get very critical of my abilities. One rejection can feel like a ton of bricks has been dumped on your confidence. I’m 30, and have no income, no house, no kids. My health is hugely unreliable, and I’m currently infertile. I’m highly specialised in something very few people are actually interested in – either inside or outside of academia. I’m not sure I even see science as a good use of the planet’s resources sometimes. I want to be self-employed, but don’t have any presently useful skills, and sometimes have so little self-confidence I just don’t see how I could do it anyway. I’m bored with food, and am not yet convinced this #whole30 thing is worth it. I’m constantly hungry, I’m still bloated, my skin is awful, my hair looks thin, my glands are up, and last night I’m pretty sure I felt the tingle of a cold sore. I’m distinctly grumpy.

What I really want right now is to go eat a pack of American-style chocolate cookies, which thankfully I don’t have the motivation to go buy. I know I’d regret it afterwards, but I do at least know I’d enjoy eating them. I guess that’s the problem with food addictions: food doesn’t criticise, doesn’t question. It just makes you feel better, albeit for a short while, when you're feeling rubbish. That’s why you get addicted.

Ugh.

#whole30 #day4

Breakfast: smoked mackerel, rice, kimchi

Lunch: bento box with sweet potato, radishes, pepper, chicken and kimchi - and olive oil.

Dinner: broccoli, courgette, pepper, chicken, sweet potato and kimchi.

Getting bored of the same food day in, day out...

#day3 Dilemma.

This Sunday it is my grandad’s 88th birthday. In respect for his accumulated years we are, as a family, going to a posh hotel for afternoon tea.

This will not be #whole30 friendly.

So do I just not go?

Of course not - it’s his 88th birthday! But explaining no sugar, no grains, no dairy to my grandad will only leave him confused, and upset that I’m being ‘different’.

So, I called them earlier today and asked what they could do for me, which was a gluten-free, diabetic (i.e. reduced sugar) afternoon tea. I was pretty impressed they could do that much, and decided it would do.

I know “off roading” isn’t allowed during the #Whole30, and if this were with friends I probably could have negotiated it; but I’m pretty sure sitting with a cup of black tea and not eating anything while everyone else tucked in would just have led to me alienating my grandad on a special day, which I’m just not down with. Life will present me with these challenges, and like with so many other things, I guess the best we can do, is the best we can do.

Should I have moved my Whole30 to another time? Possibly - but then my brother wouldn’t be able to join me until August, and I really wanted to get started.

I think maybe I’ll treat this as a trial, and do another one later. After all, the goal is to make me feel better - and I’m pretty sure it’ll do that :)

#whole30 #day3

Breakfast: smoked mackerel, kimchi, brown rice, green tea when I got to work.

Went to bed at about 9.30 pm last night, up at 6 am and feeling great. At my desk by 7.20 :)

Lunch: bento box with rice, chicken, peppers, kimchi, radish and some sesame oil. Oh, and a naartjie.

Afternoon snack: banana, cashews, redbush tea. It's the Dragonfly Vanilla redbush and is DELICIOUS. Loving the institutional teapot and cup/saucer.

Dinner: courgette and broccoli smooshed up with 2 eggs, chicken and sweet potato.

#whole30 #day2

Breakfast: smoked mackerel and kimchi.

Brought a sweet potato for lunch and was going to buy some chicken and salad to go with it.

Forgot my wallet = sad-looking sweet potato for lunch, which I had to eat with a teaspoon as someone nicked all the forks in the staff room :( Doh!

On the up-side I finished nice and early (having started nice and early) and went food shopping.

Dinner: chicken, broccoli, pepper, rice, a few cashews and some olive oil.

Hungry day, but feeling ok.

Letter to myself

Dear Bee,

Why are you doing this Whole 30 diet? Why make things so difficult for yourself? Why cut out so many foods that you enjoy, at a time when it’s possible you’ll be craving them the most? Why be hungry? Why be awkward when you go to people’s houses for dinner?

I think it’s important that these things are down in black and white, as there will be times (perhaps very soon) when the motive behind this is eclipsed by short-term desires and cravings.

Once you were slim, and full of energy. Your skin was bad and confidence low, but you could eat whatever you liked and not put on weight. People called you ‘skinny’ and possibly not in a complimentary way. The backs of your arms weren’t chubby because you were constantly on the move, and didn’t crave sugar all the time.

To be fair I think it all started in that final year of uni, living with Anna. That’s when you learned to eat an entire bar of Dairy Milk, or half a cake in a single sitting. I guess 21 isn’t the age you want to be learning bad habits.

But you held it all together until after uni, and the chain of events precipitated by dad’s leaving led to your slow but steady weight gain. During the NVQ everything was fine as you were outdoors all the time, but come teacher training and Dave, it all went a bit wrong. The weight crept on, the health problems that had been building bore fruit. You were overweight, tired, anaemic, depressed.

The body you have now is testament to a bad time in your life, the lowest time, and it’s time to shift it, and move on.

This diet is not primarily about weight loss, or even looking good, although you know deep down you want to be that slim girl again.

It’s about feeling good.

Having energy.

Beating the sugar cravings that lead to your PCOS.

Making the best chance of beating cancer, diabetes and Alzheimer’s in the future.

Having clear skin.

Keeping your figure after having kids.

Being able to have kids.

Getting rid of cellulite.

Being the fit, healthy person you’ve never had the confidence to believe you can be.

Because life starts NOW – not when the PhD is done, not when you get your first paycheck doing a new job. You can be successful doing something you love, and you can be that person who gets up at 6 am, goes for a run, then gets down to work running her own business. It can all begin now.

Right now, your weight is stuck at 11 st 7 lb. That is a whole lot less than at Christmas. But you can shift that stone to get back to 10 ½ st – where you were when life still made sense. A weight your body stuck at for ages. A size you were happy with. When you had energy and far fewer body issues.

Why wait? In a month you could be a new person. Just give it the 30 days, then you can make up your mind where to go next.

Stick at it. You can do it.

Bee x x

#whole30 #day1

So, as my lovely brother has agreed to accompany me on this adventure, we have to start today so he can go to a beer festival at the end... (I know, right?) (love you lil bro ;) )

The problem is that I'm going to be working away from home for a week at Rothamsted, and staying up at 'the manor' - the old manor house which presumably once housed the chap who founded Rothamsted (I's look it up if my brain weren't already full) where visiting students now get housed.

The only problem with this is that my sole means of cooking for myself this week will be a suite of microwaves - goodbye rice cooker, goodbye toasted nuts and seeds, goodbye flavour in general.

For this reason I have decided to allow rice in my diet - at least for this first week. It forms a staple of my diet generally, and I'm fairly sure I'm ok with it. There are only so many sweet potatoes I can eat.

Of course, being busy, I didn't manage to get pictures of my food today, so-

Breakfast - banana, black tea, brazil nuts

Lunch - leftover Japanese food from meal out yesterday in London (they did me a doggy bag :D) : rice, salmon, lettucey salad stuff

Dinner - sweet potato, chicken, veggies

#Whole30

So, despite numerous interventions into my diet I still get sick, often. I can't help but wondering if I'm doing it all wrong...

So my ickle brother and I have decided to do a Whole30 for, well, 30 days, to see if it'll help my poorly digestive system. Bless his soul for giving me moral support in this.

I'll be blogging every day to record my thoughts and progress...